Harvard Business Review published an insightful piece on relationships and social media.1 The author said, “Despite all the excitement surrounding social media, the Internet isn’t connecting us as much as we think it is. It’s largely home to weak, artificial connections… thin relationships.”
It wasn’t long ago that staying in touch meant sitting down to write a letter, something thoughtful that required time and effort. All it takes today is the swipe of a finger to connect. Pictures can be shared and a few words exchanged without much effort or time. It’s all so convenient, but it seems to come with a cost: the Internet makes us less willing to work at our friendships. Sadly, we become content with thinness.
Should thin relationships characterize God’s people? No. Christians have been adopted into God’s family, called His own, and given the honor of serving Him. They’ve been united to Christ and to each other forever in a family that spans that ages. What binds believers together isn’t their favorite movies and sports teams, but something much deeper: they’ve been called out of this world and united to Christ. Where He’s most treasured and enjoyed, talked about and loved, relationships grow around Christ as centerpiece and cannot help but become thick.
“What binds [Christians] together is not common education, common race, common income levels, common politics, common nationality, common accents, common jobs… No, they have all been saved by Jesus Christ and owe Him a common allegiance” ~ D.A. Carson.
God designed the church to have thick friendships, and that’s what we see in Paul’s ministry. At the end of Colossians is a list of names that mean little to us. They did, however, mean a great deal to Paul. So, as he closes his letter, he shares with the church in Colossae how he wasn’t alone. He had a team, a family who served alongside him. These friends encouraged and suffered with Paul, persevered with him in ministry, provided comfort when it was needed, and regularly prayed for him. Let’s look them.
Letters From Rome (Colossians 4:7-9)
Travel wasn’t easy in the first century, and Paul traveled at least 13,000 miles preaching Christ and planting churches. He hadn’t visited Colossae when he wrote this letter. He was in the city of Rome, imprisoned when a friend all the way from Colossae (1,200 miles away) arrived to visit him. Epaphras arrived with an update, and Paul responded by writing to the church. But who will deliver the letter? Tychicus and Onesimus.
Epaphras stayed with Paul, but Tychicus was already in Rome ready to set out for Colossae. He was part of a band of brothers who had joined Paul before this imprisonment (Acts 20:4). Tychicus wasn’t arrested or imprisoned. He wasn’t forced to be in Rome with Paul. Rather, this man left all he had for the sake of the gospel.
Colossians 4:7-8—“Tychicus will tell you all about my activities… and with him Onesimus… They will tell you of everything that has taken place here.”
So, Paul tells the Colossians that Tychicus is a “beloved brother and faithful minister” (Col 4:7). He wrote the same words to the church in Ephesus (Eph 6:21). Being faithful and fiercely loyal to Paul, Tychicus was to deliver the letters of Ephesians, Colossians, and Philemon on his journey back.
Who’s Onesimus? He’s a runaway slave. He fled to Rome, ended up meeting Paul, and became a Christian. In God’s good providence, Onesimus became one of Paul’s friends, a brother on equal footing. Paul even referred to him as “my very heart” (Phil 1:12). Onesimus had run from Philemon—a wealthy Christian in Colossae. So, Paul wrote to Philemon that he and his slave, Onesimus, should reconcile not as master and slave but as brothers in Christ. Amazing story!
Onesimus returned to Colossae with Tychicus to meet with his old master, Philemon. “Welcome him as you would welcome me” (Phil 1:17). Church history indicates that this slave eventually pastored the Colossian church. How was that possible? Because in Christ, there is “neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free” (Gal 3:28). The vast differences between the most lordly king and the lowest pauper evaporate in Christ. The two become brothers who owe all to Him.
Greetings to Pass Along (Colossians 4:10-15)
We’re in the early 60’s AD when we read Colossians. Paul is in Rome as a prisoner awaiting trial. He hadn’t committed a crime. Rather, a violent mob spotted him back in Jerusalem and tried to kill him (Acts 21:30-31). Roman soldiers had broken up the crowd, and Paul soon stood before two political leaders to defend himself (Acts 23-26). But all of this happened four years ago… and Paul was still awaiting trial.
Colossians 4:10—“Aristarchus my fellow prisoner greets you.”
The first mention of Aristarchus takes us back to Ephesus, a major city not far from Colossae. Paul had spent three years ministering to Christians in the city when his ministry sparked an uproar. Why? Well, if Jesus is God, then Artemis isn’t… and Artemis worship was a lucrative business. Christianity grew to the point that it threatened the wealth of the city. A mob formed, and though Paul wasn’t seized, Aristarchus was (Acts 19:28-29).
This tells us that Aristarchus had spent years enduring many trials with Paul. He was a friend who never seems to have left the apostle’s side, even going all the way to Rome to be with him in prison.
Aristarchus, Mark, and Justus are the only Jewish believers who were Paul’s “fellow workers for the kingdom of God” (Col 4:11). There were other Jewish Christians, but none like these three to him.
Justus likely heard the gospel when Paul was beaten by the mob back in Jerusalem. Similar to Aristarchus or Tychicus, he left all to serve Christ by helping Paul.
Mark, or John Mark, had known Paul the longest of this group. That doesn’t mean he was a great companion—Mark had abandoned Paul at one point and couldn’t be trusted (Acts 15:38). Yet, it seems Peter had quite an impact upon Mark, eventually calling him “my son” (1 Pet 5:13). Mark grew under Peter, and he reconciled with Paul to the point that Paul called him a “comfort” and “very helpful” (Col 4:11; 2 Tim 4:11). Mark even wrote the Gospel that bears his name.
Colossians 4:12—“Epaphras, who is one of you, a servant of Christ Jesus, greets you, always struggling on your behalf in his prayers”
Epaphras is the one who arrived from Colossae concerned about his church. A 1,200 mile trip to meet with an apostle. The Colossian church was a good one in many ways—it was filled with faith, hope, and love (Col 1:3-8). Yet, it was starting to give ground on the most fundamental doctrines. Epaphras refused to stand idle.
As a leader in the church, maybe its pastor, Epaphras went to Rome. Paul gave him his full support and wanted the church to know what kind of leader they have in this man—he’s “always struggling” for you in prayer and has constantly “worked hard for you” (Col 4:12-13). Epaphras had the heart of a shepherd.
Two more greetings to pass along from Rome come from Luke and Demas. Luke was a well-educated physician, the same man who wrote the Gospel of Luke and Acts. Demas was part of Paul’s team for a few years, but four years later Paul would say to Timothy, “Do you best to come to me soon. For Demas, in love with this present world, has deserted me… Luke alone is with me” (2 Tim 4:9-11). Luke stayed with Paul to the very end; Demas was done with it all. Jesus had his Judas; Paul had his Demas. Amid all the joys of thick friendships that will last forever around God’s throne, some men will throw it all away for a few pieces of silver.
Final Instructions (Colossians 4:16-18)
Paul ended by encouraging the church to read this letter and to have it read among the other churches in the region (Col 4:16). Books were read aloud in churches. No one owned a Bible like we do. They were copied after reading, passed along, and the church would wait to read another letter written by an apostle.
Colossians 4:17—“And say to Archippus, ‘See that you fulfill the ministry that you have received in the Lord.’”
While Epaphras was away, Archippus may have been leading the church in Colossae. If not this church, he was pastoring one not far away. The Book of Colossians has several instructions, and it ends with men from Paul’s ministry team. Be like these guys, Aristarchus.
We know nothing about this man. Honestly, we don’t know much about any of the men on Paul’s team. We know Paul but almost nothing about those around him. And with the exception of Demas, I think that’s what they wanted. If helping Paul exalts Christ, we’ll do it! Like John the Baptist, they only wanted Jesus to increase (Jn 3:30).
[1]For article, see Umair Haque, “The Social Media Bubble”, Harvard Business Review (March 23, 2010).